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6th Sep 2013, 11:22 AM Episode #10 Script

Ok so now that #10 has finished posting I can now post the script. In talking about this episode, let me just start out by saying this was an interesting one. First of all, it's the one where I finally figured out how to advance a story by only posting one page at a time and yet still have a feeling of closure with each one. I hate when pages just cut off in mid-sentance, so I never wanted to do that. That's why for a while I was posting 2 or 3 or even up to 8 pages at a time. That was a little ridiculous. So I started to think about as if every page was a sunday comic strip (minus the color). I think this story is the most concise of any I've done because of this limitation. I did have to deviate a little more from the script than I have before, but as long as it works is what matters.

In talking about the story itself, this one went through a lot of changes. The idea was around a long time (I think it was suggested around episode #8 or so) but every time I tried to write it, it just kind of died. When we first started, it was supposed to be that April was watching them for her sister or something like that. Not  bad idea, but there was no real conflict driving the story foreward. Sure we could've had them destroying the house like we ended up doing, but you kind of knew that whatever they did was only temporary and they were still going to get picked up at some point or another. Zack said I should do it like they did in an episode of My Little Pony (which is still the only episode I've seen so far) but that show is geared toward teaching lessons, and I'm... not. So we couldn't do that.

Then once I changed it to them being orphaned, then things seemed to fall better in to place. But not entirely. At one point I had it where in order to have them flown to the little girl's house they needed to get the money (food) so they had to gamble to get it and... needless to say, it didn't work. That script bombed worse than ever I've ever written. So I got rid of that idea (actually I kind of used it in the next story, but I don't want to give too much away) and just had it be about him taking care of them while waiting for Luke to come back. That worked much better.

It's definitely the best episode I've done so far. It isn't my favorite idea, but it has some good lines and I think it's also the one where I got the art style close to what I want it to be. I also realized just how bad I am at writing cute stuff. I can draw it just fine, but cute stories don't come to me that easily. By comparison, a story like Episode #8 came to me very quickly. I think that's why I wanted to work the gambling into the story, because that stuff I know how to do.

The only part I hate is the first page. When I originally drew it, the Indiana Jones parody took place over about five pages. But only posting a page at a time meant I had to somehow get all of that into one page. I did my best, but I still think it looks awful (and I'm not the only one who thinks this). The only saving grace is that it's just one page and then we can move on to better stuff. I kind of wonder what it would like printed though.

But other than that, I'd say this episode is one that I can look back on and think "This is where I figured out what I want the series to be". And that means something.

 

Episode #9 Fourth Draft

Story by Stephen Leotti and Zack Adamczak

Script by Stephen Leotti

Regular Characters:

                Stardust

                Freddie

                Luke

                April

Guest Characters:

                Kittens

                Veronica – A swan

                Nicole – Another swan

                Pigeon

                Claire

Scene A

Est. Shot – Mountain

Ext. Jungle – Day

Three figures in silhouette walk through the jungle. Two are carrying backpacks lead by one in a hat. They get to a pond. The one in the hat is reading a map. Suddenly one of the men carrying a backpack pulls out a gun. The man in the hat pulls out a whip and snaps it out of his hand. He steps out of the shadows and we see it is Freddie in a Fedora.

Voice (off screen) – What the hell are you doing?

Cut to – Int. Attic

                We see Freddie dressed in the outfit with Stardust looking at him rather puzzled look.

Freddie – Well, I was reading on the internets-

Stardust  – Internet. It’s singular.

Freddie – But in all those captions it says…

Stardust – No those are LOLcats they’re…oh never mind. Continue.

Freddie – OK fine. InterNET-

Stardust – Much better.

Freddie - …That there’s people who dress up as their favorite characters. So I decided I would be Professor of archaeology Indiana Jones!

Stardust – Well yeah, but I think you’re taking the idea a little too far. Mostly they just mingle in large convention centers.  They don’t literally become the character mind, body, and soul.

Freddie – Well, there’s no law that says I can’t right?

Stardust – Hey far be it from me to tell you what to do. Anyway I need you to get something from the kitchen for me. I overslept and I’m supposed to meet Luke in about 2 ½ minutes.

Freddie – Is he back already? Wow That winter went fast.

Stardust – Too fast apparently. But if I leave now I should be able to make it.

                He gets up and starts toward the door.

Freddie – Can I come too?

                Stardust stops and turns toward him.

Stardust – Dressed like that?

Freddie – Does it bother you that much?

Stardust – Ugh whatever I don’t have time to argue with you. Just don’t start humming the theme song or anything.

Scene B

Ext. Pond – Day

                Luke stands by the water accompanied by two swans, Veronica and Nicole.

Veronica – Come one Lukey, we came cause we wanted to go to Canada with you…

Nicole – Yeah why do we have to hang around in the middle of nowhere?

Luke – Uhm I hate to tell you this, but Canada looks pretty much like this…

Cut to – Stardust and Freddie running up the road. They skid to a stop when they reach the pond.

Luke – Well now who’s late, Frodo?

Stardust – (Completely out of breath) I…(gasp)…lost…(gasp)…track of time.

Luke – I guess we’re even now. Anyway these two lovely ladies are accompanying me back home. This is Veronica…

Veronica – Charmed.

Luke – And Nicole…

Nicole – Enchanted.

Stardust – (With a smile) Howdy. (He leans in close to Luke) Ménage a trois eh? 

Luke – Do you really need me to answer that?

                They both chuckle.

Veronica – What was that, dear?

Luke - Nothing darling, nothing at all.

Freddie – Aren’t you gonna introduce me?

                The girls turn and see Freddie in his cowboy outfit.

Stardust – Oh yeah this uh…this is Freddie. He lives in my house.

                Freddie takes off his hat and bows.

Nicole – Why is he wearing that?

Freddie – Well why can’t I? Nobody tells YOU what to do.

Stardust – Just…just ignore it.

Luke – Hey I don’t judge others by their lifestyles.

Veronica – (To Nicole) Awww he so considerate.

Nicole – And his accent is so cute!

Stardust – I never really noticed an accent.

Luke – Yeah well it gets thicker around relatives. Anyway, I’m sorry I don’t have anything for you this time.

Stardust – Oh that’s alright. I’m trying to cut back anyway.

Veronica (off-screen) – What is that man doing?!

They all turn and see a man on the bridge over the pond. He is putting kittens in a bag. He ties the end, drops it in the water, and drives off.

Veronica – Oh those poor things!

Nicole – Yeah someone needs to save them!

Stardust – Well I would but I’m terrified of water…

Luke – Have no fear!

                He flies up and dives in the water.

Girls – Oh he’s so heroic!

Luke emerges from the water with the bag in his beak. He lands on the shore. They untie the bag and the kittens pop up, soaking wet. 

Stardust – Well now that the rest of us look bad…

Freddie – Can we keep em?

Stardust – Yeah I don’t think we have—

Veronica – What kind of cruel, heartless—

Nicole – --insentive, uncaring--

Stardust – (With a forced smile) Su-u-u-ure, why not?

Scene C

Int. Attic

The kittens sleep in a box that is turned on its side with a blanket in it.

Freddie – Where do you suppose they came from?

Stardust – Oh who knows probably strays abandoned by their mother. I gotta find a way to get them outta here.

Freddie – But they’re so cute. And besides all they do is sleep.

Stardust – Yes, but that’ll change soon. And besides, I can’t raise kittens. They’d end up more messed up then I am.

Freddie – Well I’ll take care of them too.

Stardust – Oh that’s great. What makes you think they won’t eat you eventually?

Freddie – Well why won’t you?

Stardust – I told you I was messed up. Anyway I’m sorry but they can’t stay. If only there was some place they could go.

Freddie – Too bad we couldn’t give them to that little girl.

Stardust – You mean the one that kidnapped me?

Freddie – Sure! You said she liked animals.

Stardust – That’s a slight understatement. Ok I’ll grant you it could work except its like 40 miles away. I only made it back by flying, remember?

Freddie – Well couldn’t we have them flown too?

Stardust –Nah, it would cost a fortune. And the only one I know who’d do it for free would be Luke and he’s already gone.

Freddie – Yeah we can’t exactly call him on the phone either.

                Stardust thinks for a moment.

Stardust – No…but we can do something almost as good.

                He gets up and begins walking out.

Stardust - I need you to stay here while I go do something. I’ll be back later.

                Freddie looks at the kittens sleeping.

Freddie – Uhh…ok.

Scene D

Ext. – Road – Day

                Stardust stands talking to a pigeon.

Stardust – So how much is this gonna cost?

 

Pigeon – When do you need the message there by?

Stardust – As soon as possible.

Pigeon – Well we do offer an overnight rate at two bags of Doritos.

Stardust – Yeah I don’t think I can do that.

Pigeon – And then our priority rate is one bag of seed. We accept sunflower, soy, or sesame.

Stardust – And how long is that?

Pigeon – Should be about two days.

Stardust – Ok, only two days, I guess I can handle that.

Int. Attic

                Freddie sits watching the kittens. Slowly one opens its eyes.

Cut to – Kitten’s POV. It looks at Freddie with blurred vision that slowly comes into focus as it squints. The others slowly wake up as well.

Freddie – Hey you’re awake! Are you guys hungry?

They begin to stand up. They walk slowly toward him completely ignoring the bowl of milk that’s out for them.

Cut to – Stardust walking up the stairs. When he gets inside the attic he sees Freddie hanging from a light switch with the kittens swiping at him.

Freddie – Help!

Stardust – Only two days…

Scene E

The next morning…

Est. Shot – House - Morning

Narrator - Having been up all night trying to keep the young ones from destroying the house…

                Cut to - Int. Attic

Stardust lying passed out on the floor.

Narrator – He finds himself utterly exhausted.

He is woken up by the sound of something falling over.

Stardust – Ngyah! Wha – what was…

                A ball rolls past him. Followed by the kittens chasing after it.

Cut to – Int. Kitchen

                April sits at the table drinking coffee and reading the newspaper. She hears banging upstairs.

Cut back to Attic

                Stardust is chasing them around the room when he hears footsteps coming up the stairs.

Stardust – Oh crap!

When April reaches the attic sees Stardust calmly lying in the middle of the floor. He smiles innocently at her. She turns around and leaves. The kittens pop up from underneath his stomach.

Stardust – Now I’m serious you guys have got to calm down! I haven’t slept more than 2 hours. That’s 16 too few.

Freddie – (From inside his house) Is it safe for me to come out yet?

Stardust – Don’t think so. They’re still a little wound up.

Freddie – Well can’t they watch TV or something?

Stardust – Well I tried that. But since we don’t have cable all that’s on right now are talk shows and reruns of MacGyver….Hey I wonder if we still have that…

                He goes and rummages through some stuff.

Stardust – Bingo!

                Shortly…

                Stardust pokes his head up from behind the TV.

Stardust – Ok it should be all set. Hit the switch.

                The Nintendo logo pops up on the screen.

Freddie – Wow 16-bit graphics that aren’t supposed to be nostalgic or ironic.

Stardust – Yeah it’s called the 90’s. Now excuse me while I go collapse.

Scene F

                The following morning…

Int. Attic

                Freddie sits playing Nintendo with the kittens watching intently.

Stardust – Have you seriously been playing this for 18 hours straight?

Freddie – I’m trying to beat the “three hearts, no saving” challenge.

Stardust – The internet has really changed you.

They hear a tapping on the window. Stardust opens it and sees Luke and the girls hovering outside.

Luke – I thought saving the day at the last minute was your job?

                Shortly…

Int. Attic

Luke – So where is this place exactly?

Stardust – Well I’m not…100% percent sure.

Luke – I thought you’ve been there?

Stardust – Yeah… but I was in a basket. I know generally where it is though.

Luke – And where is that…generally speaking?

Stardust – Ok do you know where Cottontown is?

Luke – What’s that, an amusement park?

Stardust – No it’s a road…

Luke – I only know main highways…

Stardust – Uhh…ok follow Wards till you get to...

Luke – I said highways…

Stardust – That is a highway.

Luke – Highways have numbers…

Stardust – Ok it’s also 29 North…

Luke – Why does it have two names?

Stardust – I don’t know!

Luke – Whoever designed this town should be shot.

Stardust – I guess we’re gonna have to try it another way.

                Cut to – Luke and the girls flying. Each one is carrying a kitten.

                Cut back to Stardust. He is talking into a microphone.

Stardust – So what do you see?

                Cut back to Luke. Who is wearing a headset.

 Luke – Umm…let’s see…trees…trees…more trees…

Stardust – Alright I get it smart ass.

Luke – Ok we’re coming up on some houses now. How do we know which one’s it?

Stardust – What do they look like?

Luke – Well one’s painted like the American flag…

Stardust – No that’s not it.

Luke – And this one… a woman sunbathing topless.

Stardust – I… don’t… think so…

Luke – And the next one has…an extremely fat dog in back yard.

Stardust – That’s it!

Luke – Are you sure?

Stardust – Positive!

Luke –  

They drop each kitten. Each one has a small parachute that opens after a few seconds. They float down and land on the doorstep. Claire opens the door and sees them. She runs back in the house.

Claire – Mommy!

The End